visitor at work

i freaked! like big time freaked out at triage just awhile ago.
this monstrous looking creature thats supposed to be extinct together with the dinosaurs visited as i was triaging one kid.
yes. its a humongous cockroach.
much as i tried to remain calm, but i guess failed terribly when i screamed together with the mom n the girl as i brisked out from T3 (i was sitting at T2).
i was jus lucky it wasn't those flying kind.
and i thought i "acted" brave by sending the mom n the girl off to registration ASAP while i think of a way to get rid of that thing crawling. haa.
of course, my exquisite solution was none other than calling kevin for help, thinking he's the only guy available in the dept (don't think dr saumya would be pleasured to attend to such request).
shit him. he wasn't inside but maria offered to come to my rescue. such a heroine isn't she? :)
and perhaps kev was jus very much fated to that cockroach that he appeared at triage jus as maria arrived.
so he went and gave it a good smash while i screamed my way out of triage.
there it goes. juices squirted all over and as flat as can be, and off it went to the bin at T1.
that was the fate for visiting the wrong person at the wrong time. haa.

okays, enough of that yucky thing.

kev dealt me at 70 bucks for the paeds stethoscope! woohooooo!!!
much better deal than anywhere else in the world i guess.


the haunting of connecticut was goooooood!
scared my pants off but rather touching story.
i'm in for a second round if anyone wants! *grins.

sadist.

indeed. totally a sadist.
i'm making myself happy by 'watching' others' misery.
well, not exactly laughing at them, but rather, telling myself i shld be happy i wasn't in their shoes. i'm luckier in a sense.
not trying to sound noble seriously. i really did felt better.

another thing tt makes me feel better: gossiping.
haa. not tt i'm a total fan of gossiping. (okays, i see u rolling ur eyes)
it feels irritating at times, especially if we gossip on the same topic like for the 100th time.
feels as though we gossip for the sake of gossiping, brainless and just makes us no different from some bimbos out there.
but one thing that assures me after each session.
that i have the support from my girls, no matter what happens and ALWAYS.
and even though its for the 101st time saying it, they will still do it to make me feel better. :)

concussed

shit me. another night of absurd drinking. dead drunk.
its not totally the alcohol tt made me drunk seriously.
i went out of control. let go of my emotions just like tt.
i knew what i did and i wanted to stop but i just couldn't help it.
the tears just had to fall.
perhaps its been there for too long.
that i didn't allow it to flow after i said no more tears.
i didn't understand why i have to be like this.
why can't i just live with all my emotions and not hide it like its so unglam.
i did nothing wrong didn't i?
why do i have to make myself stay strong when the fact is, i was badly hurt.
shouldn't the one who caused the hurt be the one who's hiding?
i thought i was so over it. i thought.
but i guess i'm still hanging.
someone get me out of this, for once.

Re-opened

jus in case u're wondering. yes, i "re-opened" this blog..
not tt it was closed at all.. i jus tot i needed some privacy back den..
but its ok now.. dun need tt privacy anymore..
i would say its still quite updated for the time it was "privatised" (if there's such a word.. haa)
jus deleted ONE entry, the one tts quite recent..
well, i din like being treated tt way so i shall not do the same to others even thou i may hatethatsomeonetothecoreofmyarse.
okays, i dun go ard hating ppl.. jus this someone..

well well, if u even bother and it interests u, den u can read on my previous posts (unedited).
i do warn that some entries may be quite offensive so jus bear with it ya..
its my past and wats done cannot be undone.
frm now on i shall move on and NEVER walk the same path, repeat the same mistakes again.

:)

nice.